


And Then Shawarma

by SilverRumRunner



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 17:50:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/852333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverRumRunner/pseuds/SilverRumRunner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Someone had to watch Loki while the others took a lunch break.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Then Shawarma

**Author's Note:**

> This is a one-shot fic idea I've thought about for a while, but just got inspired to finally write it myself. I tried to keep them in character. Not beta'd.

Darcy ran down the empty streets, slipping and tripping over rubble in her haste.  It appeared the aliens were all dead and done swarming in the sky.  She hoped they were dead anyway, since she passed a few on her way to the heart of the disaster zone.  The chaos ended just minutes ago, so the officials had yet to put up the inevitable roadblocks and restricted areas.  In between live news footage of the aliens and Iron Man zooming around, she saw some well placed lightning strikes.  The skies were blue and cloudless, so she had a pretty good feeling Jane’s part time homeless guy, part time thunder god made a reappearance.  And if she didn’t contact him on Jane’s behalf, she was pretty sure her friendship card would be revoked.

She heard bickering before she turned the corner.  There stood a group of people, all looking bigger than her as well as armed.  They appeared to be in the middle of a heated debate.  At the center, stood Thor, towering over all the others and scowling as he gripped Mjolnir tightly.  

Despite the devastation around her, Darcy couldn’t stop her emotions of pure glee.  She sprinted in his direction and shouted his name.  By the time he turned she already reached him and wrapped her arms around his waist.  “I can’t believe you’re back!”

“Lady Darcy.  I’m pleased to see you again.” Thor said.  He patted her back with one hand, but even him trying to be gentle knocked the wind out of her.  She let go of her hug and straightened her back.  

“Jane is going to freak when she finds out you’re back.”  

“Why are you not with Jane?” Thor’s voice held an edge of concern.

“I was with her, until a few days ago when she got a spur of the moment offer to work with some brainiacs in Europe. I decided I was in some serious need of a vacay, so I came here to visit friends and crash on their couch.” Darcy noticed for the first time a man and woman dressed in black suits, armed, and with the all familiar bird logo of SHIELD. “And I think I know where her spontaneous job offer came from.” She narrowed her eyes and glared at the agents.

“This reunion is touching and all, but I remember being promised Shawarma after we scraped your Hulk-smashed brother off my floor,” Tony Stark said.  He no longer wore his famous red suit, and looked a bit worse for wear.  His snark remained intact.

“Forgive me, but I do not trust leaving my brother alone with these people of SHIELD,” Thor said.

“And I don’t think it’s smart to get him in a confined area without potentially pissing off the green guy again,” said a tired looking guy who stood off to the side, wearing ill-fitting clothing.

Upon hearing the mention of Thor’s brother, Darcy leaned to look behind the god.  She saw a professional looking archer, a red head checking her pistol, and it was either the actual Captain America resurrected or the best cosplayer ever.  They all corralled around a tall, pale, and injured man.  He dressed in leather and tarnished bits of armour.  He wore some sort of metal muzzle and impressive looking shackles. His gaze directed at the ground as he did an admirable job of ignoring everyone.

“Whoa, this is Loki?” Darcy’s statement interrupted the others from their arguing. “The guy who incinerated Puente Antiguo, is the same one to lead this alien invasion?” Darcy crossed her arms and shook her head. “Jeez, Thor. Can’t you crate train him or something so you can visit in peace for once?”

Without moving his head, Loki raised his eyes to stare ahead of him.

Stark absentmindedly tapped his chest as he was lost in thought for a few seconds. “I like her. Leave Sid with Nancy here so we can go eat.”

It took Darcy a moment to realize Stark was referring to her. “Wait, what?” She looked around at all of them and didn’t like their expressions. “You can’t possibly be considering this. I’m not babysitting this dude.”

Thor nodded his head. “I am content with this solution.”

Captain America sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Is it even worth voicing how idiotic this plan is.”

Darcy almost yelled yes, but Stark spoke first. “It would be idiotic if us heros saved the world from aliens only to die from hunger afterwards.” He bossed the two agents to step away and stand on the opposite side of the street.

“Can’t we just leash him to a signpost or something?” Darcy asked, but no one gave any indication of listening to her.

She experienced an out of body sensation as everyone started to disperse, leaving her standing alone with Loki.  The archer and baggy clothes guy went into the nearby restaurant.  Stark went in to eat next when he finished bullying the agents to stay put. Thor spoke some stern words to Loki, but they were too quiet to hear. Hopefully they included ‘don’t hurt, mangle, or kill Darcy.’ With a nod and smile to Darcy, he followed inside.

Captain set a hand on her shoulder. “The agents will still be nearby.  And we’re just inside.  Holler if he gives you any trouble.” He looked the most reluctant to leave, but apparently the smell of food overpowered his urge to stay and guard her.

The red head cocked her weapon to load it, then handed it to Darcy. “If he so much as scratches his nose in a threatening way, shoot.  It won’t kill him, but it should slow him.”  The woman went inside before Darcy could reply with an unconfident thank you.

Darcy loosely held the butt of the pistol in one hand and held it away from her.  She looked nervously at the gun, then at Loki.  Using a taser was one thing, but potentially shooting a gun at a super powered alien with a bad attitude was something else entirely.  “Please don’t make me use this.  Deal?” She waited for some sort of acknowledgement, but he continued to stare across the street where the agents stood.  

Darcy sighed and combed her fingers through her hair.  She pulled her phone out.  She tried making calls to Jane, but all lines were jammed with people calling their loved ones.  “Would it be too much to hope that I could entertain you for an hour by letting you watch a cartoon on my phone?”  She smiled, trying to cajole a reaction out of him.  She huffed when even that didn’t work.  “Fine, whatever.” Darcy dusted off the step leading into the restaurant and sat down. She laid the gun next to her, worried more about shooting herself sooner than Loki.  “You’d think I’d know better by now.  Next time Thor shows up, I need to run in the other direction.  Because where he goes, trouble follows in black leather.”  

She played an app game on her phone for a while before she noticed Loki shifting his feet. She looked up and shaded her eyes with her hand to block the sunlight.  “You want to sit down? They’ll probably be a while.”  He stopped moving and once again, gave no reply to her question. She refocused back on her game.  She had a bad feeling the others would delay as long as possible before they had to come back to reclaim him. Lucky her.

She froze when he moved down a step.  She internally panicked that he was about to make a break for it.  She envisioned ways she could try to tackle him.  But instead, he simply sat on the step next to her.  She scooted over since he took up a lot of room given his long legs.  That was her official reason for giving him some space. She wasn’t about to admit her fear of this failed, alien villain. Not in front of him or the super friends anyway. She had no complaints when he continued to look straight ahead in silence.

Pretty sure he currently paid no attention to her existence, Darcy held her phone out in one hand. She positioned it so it would capture a shot of her and Loki in the background.  She smiled and gave the peace sign as she snapped a photo.  She held the screen up to check and almost dropped it in fright seeing the image of Loki looking directly at her. She looked to her side and saw him still glaring at her. “I really hope that’s not your murderous face,” she said. He turned his body towards her and narrowed his green eyes. “Nope, that is your murderous face. Just relax, ok. Not like I’m posting this on Facebook or anything.” Not that she could even if she wanted to.  Her picture of Thor got her the most likes ever, until SHIELD hacked her account and removed it.

Darcy looked down at her phone and swiped through some old photos she took. She paused seeing one of her parents and dog back home. A sudden wave of homesickness overwhelmed her.  She tried blinking away the tears best she could.  She sniffed and said, “You’re a big bag of dicks, you know that?” Loki rolled his eyes and turned away again. “Don’t give me that crap.  This is the second time you attacked a place I’m in.”  She looked back down at her phone and mumbled. “I hope your dad gives you an Asgardian god-size spanking when you get home.”  

Loki’s cuffed hand seized the phone from her grip and yanked it away. “Stop! Give it back.” She reached for it, but Loki easily held it out of her reach. His whole body tensed when she leaned against him trying to get the device back.  Darcy stopped, realizing how stupid and dangerous her actions were.  She backed off and held her hands up. “I’m sorry.  I’ll delete it, ok. Just please, don’t break it.” She’d be devastated to be without reminders of home or a way to contact anyone right now.

Loki stared at her for a few moments, holding her phone in a tight grip.  When she made it clear she would no longer fight him for it, he lowered his arm and brought the phone in front of him to view.  He swiped his thumb across the screen.  Darcy wondered when he became so adept with smart phones.  

After a few images, he paused on one. Darcy leaned closer and saw the image of her mom smiling while planting new azaleas in the backyard.  “That’s my mom.  She’s probably having a panic attack right now, thinking I could be dead from an alien laser gun or something.  I can’t imagine how she must be feeling.” Darcy shook her head and glanced over at Loki.  His brows furrowed as he continued to stare at the image. He appeared lost in whatever thoughts that raced through his mind at the moment.  

Noise of murmured talk and scraping chairs inside the building behind them pulled Darcy’s attention away from the distracted god.  When she saw the heros making their way to the door, she remembered to pick up the gun before she stood back up.  She handed it to the red head woman. “Thanks. Luckily no shots fired, unintentional or otherwise.”  She wanted to believe her comment made the deadly woman smirk, but the assassin turned away to face the archer before she could be sure.  

Loki stood effortlessly, despite his restraints.  He shrugged his arm away from Thor’s grip when his brother tried to help him.  Thor smiled at Darcy and said, “Thank you. When you speak to Jane, please tell her I have not forgotten my promise to her.”

She saluted. “Will do, big guy. But try not to be gone so long.”

Loki held her phone out for her to take back.  She hesitated a moment before taking it back. Not like he could get much use of it in Asgard anyway.  She clicked the lock screen on, and couldn’t stop her smile seeing he updated her wallpaper with the picture she took of the two of them.  She looked him in the eyes and shook her head in disbelief. “I still think you’re a bag of dicks.”  Loki nodded his head once.  Given how his eyes crinkled at their corners, she would guess he smirked under his muzzle.  

A caravan of various blacked-out vehicles pulled up in front of them.  She noticed the less than subtle images of SHIELD logos on each.  Within minutes, they all entered various ones, and drove off, including the two agents previously across the street.  

Darcy stood alone amongst the debris.   She clicked her phone on, wanting to try calling her parents or Jane again. The new picture on the screen still made her smile, reminding her of the bizarre experience. She tried opening the menu screen, but it kept failing.  She frowned and glared in the direction the cars drove off in as realization struck. “That asshole changed my password.”

 


End file.
